Tinder. Sexting. YouPorn. Oh my!
Despite all the ways that sex continues to pervade our culture, research shows that the younger generations are having less actual, in-person sex than you might think. And those having sex might still feel like something’s missing.
This week, therapist and sex researcher Alexandra Katehakis, Ph.D, joins host Dan Griffin to explore the ways that honesty, vulnerability, and a little bit of self-exploration can do more for your sex life than any app.
If you’re ready to get started, try these easy tips.
Practical & Tactical Tips
- Sit down with a piece of paper and ask yourself what you really like sexually. What’s true for you right now? What brings you pleasure? Don’t edit it and don’t judge it.
- Vulnerability is highly attractive when, paradoxically, it’s coming from a place of strength, meaning that you have a sense of certainty about who you are. That kind of vulnerability allows you to take the risk of being honest with yourself and honest with your partner(s), which in turn, helps you grow yourself up sexually in ways that are novel, exciting, and deeply fulfilling.
- Get clear about what you want in a relationship. As you start to move toward an intimate relationship with someone, pay attention to whether they are really present and receptive during sexual encounters, or if they are putting on an act. The keys to better sex and better relationships are awareness and appropriate action.
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About Our Guest
Alexandra Katehakis is the Founder and Clinical Director of the Center for Healthy Sex in Los Angeles and the author of Erotic Intelligence: Igniting Hot, Healthy Sex While in Recovery from Sex Addiction,Sex Addiction as Affect Dysregulation: A Neurobiologically Informed Holistic Treatmentand co-author of the award-winning daily meditation book, Mirror of Intimacy: Daily Reflections on Emotional and Erotic Intelligence and contributing author of the award-winning clinical textbook Making Advances: A Comprehensive Guide for Treating Female Sex and Love Addicts. Katehakis is a clinical supervisor at American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors and Therapists and clinical supervisor and member of the teaching faculty for the International Institute for Trauma and Addiction Professionals (IITAP) a national certifying body for sex addiction therapists. She is a regular contributor to Psychology Today and The Huffington Post,as well as a prominent expert panelist at sexuality conferences and public events.
Mentioned In This Episode
Mirror of Intimacy, by Alexandra Katehakis
